Cover Letter Draft

Dear Portfolio Reader,

When first entering the Writing 102 program here at Stony Brook University, I thought that it was a complete and utter waste of my time, resources as well as finances during my college career. Having aced both AP Language and AP Literature courses and exams in high school, I believed my writing style was more than adequate and that this course could do nothing for me. However, as the course progressed, I was pleasantly surprised.  Through exposure to various authors such as Carl Sagan, exploration of different writing styles and rhetorical strategies, along with the constant analysis and scrutiny of my own writing; I have improved my writing in a few major ways and have grown into a more sophisticated and efficient author. I have expanded my knowledge of the Aristotelian appeals and rhetorical strategies authors may use to accurately and efficiently articulate their arguments. Furthermore, I have developed the ability to identify and address a specific audience to which I write, allowing my thoughts and ideas to fall directly on the intended ears. Finally, I have expanded my understanding and knowledge of authoritative and scholarly resources that can be used to bolster my arguments and beliefs, allowing the arguments to carry more weight, rather than being simply opinion based.

The Rhetorical Analysis of William Weed’s, “106 Science Claims and a Truckful of Baloney” was the primary reason for my change in style and furthered understanding of Aristotelian appeals as well as specific rhetorical devices. Through analyzing the techniques and appeals implemented by Weed throughout his essay, I was able to effectively

Research Proposal Progress

I am excited about discuss the topic of Teaching to the Test, it is a great topic and I think the paper could actually help make a difference if shared with the correct people. Despite having no younger siblings, I am still interested in this topic because it pertains to the future of our nation, as well as when I have children, directly to their education and future. I have found that I have a lot to say about the fallacy of Teaching to the Test, more so than I thought. I always thought it was a bad idea, however I never realized that I could make 3 or 4 arguments as to why it is bad, and not just involving the students learning.

I have met a few difficulties along the way, the first being scholarly sources, the ones that I have found are roughly 14 years old, some may be older. Although they still have relevance, even more so since certain acts have been instituted such as the No Child Left Behind act, I would still feel better if I found more recent sources. Another difficult thing has been to condense and narrow my personal experiences and beliefs into one paragraph, rather than have it leak throughout the entire paper. I would much rather make the arguments on logic, then include personal experience and belief to fortify and give a face to the logic, but it is a hard task. A temporary problem I have run into is with the personal interviews of my old teachers, the school is currently on spring break and I won’t be able to meet with them until that beginning of next week. \

The final problem I face is deciding what to do with the test, as in how to change or reform the test, or the teacher’s teaching structure and style. Both are difficult and tricky tasks to complete, or even formulate ideas on how to change them. So far I have only been able to produce about two for each. It is especially hard for the ideas changing standardized testing because they are such large tests, governed by large bodies and corporations and often generate a good amount of revenue.

Research Proposal Teaching To The Test

Introduction;

                Remember back to your days in middle school and high school. For some of us it was yesterday, others years. If you were to take the exams you took back then, let me ask you… would you even pass them? You probably wouldn’t. Now let me ask you again, would you pass the exams you took even last semester? Once again no, you wouldn’t pass. Why? The answer is simple, it stems from the teaching method engrained in almost every middle and high school across the United States. Teaching to the Test, rather than teaching for subject education and knowledge. Teachers have been “teaching to the test”, or in other words only teaching students how to answer questions correctly, but providing no information or insight to the logic and subject behind the questions. This allows the students to do very well on the exams they prepare for, boosting the school’s rating as well as the teacher’s appearance in the eyes of the school board. However, such a method provides no gains in subject knowledge, nor retention of methods used to answer the questions. This means that students quite literally forget almost everything they learn in school, setting back every aspect of the real world one enters upon graduation. If this happens, then what is the point of wasting time in school? I ask you, how does one kill “the test”?  

Rationale:

                Being a Biochemistry Major at one of the top science schools in the nation, naturally I love science. For fun, as well as for extra money, I tutor students from my old high school. Almost every student I have met at the high school level was so disinterested in science that it hurt me; not to mention the majority of the students at SBU taking science courses to reach a desired occupation. “I just need to pass the next test”, that what they always say to me. “Once they pass the final, I’m set. I don’t need to bother with it again”. Don’t get me wrong, I myself often adopt the same mentality, but for an obscure Darwinian Medicine course, not for the main STEM courses. At the middle and High School levels, teachers are only showing the students how to pass their, as well as the State’s, exams. They don’t worry about the logic and information, the subject knowledge part, that stuff isn’t important, its high test scores they desire. This becomes apparent when I tutor. I ask the “problem” students, as well as the “perfect” students if they can explain conceptual details of basic chemistry… and none could. Not one, even the “A” students. Astounded, I questioned as to why they lacked this knowledge. To which they replied that the teacher never taught it, nor began to explain the information behind it, he just showed how to answer the problems. How can this have been possible in a nationally ranked school? How can students be going through classes without actually learning anything pertaining to the subject? What are they doing for 8 hours a day? Teaching to the test is a useless process, not only does in not help anyone, it hinders the nation as a whole, creating an unknowledgeable mass of “graduated and distinguished” adults. It needs to be stopped, and teachers need to teach to the subject, rather than the test.

Research Plan:

I myself have had plenty experience of teacher’s simply teaching to the test. I went to three separate high schools and have seen a large amount of “good” teachers who teach nothing. I also have access to the school I graduated from, as well as the students within it. I can interview several teachers as well as students I tutor. I can also research and locate the state results on exams, compare them over the years, as well as with national and international standings in basic STEM subjects.

Implications;

It’s simple, if we were to address the topic of teaching to the test, and eliminate it, then students would actually learn and retain information and knowledge of the subjects they study. This could potentially generate a more aware, productive and informed public. As well as advancing nearly every subject field due to the influx of minds being able to address a problem or scenario. 

 

The MARVELous world of Monsters

With Comics being items of major interest and entertainment, especially during the latter half of the 20th century, they tend to have a large effect on the thoughts and perceptions of their readers. That being, the images, icons and even beliefs introduced into the comics were introduced to the minds, and often integrated into the readers’ own beliefs. However, comics are often influenced by the world and the events surrounding the creation of them. Because of this, the latter half of the 20th century produced comics filled with racist stereotypes, providing mass exposure and belief of them.

Being the last half of the 20th century, and multiple wars against Asian nations, Korea, Vietnam and most notoriously the attack on Pearl Harbor, American comics, especially Marvel contained massive amounts of racist comments and depictions of Asian stereotypes. Recently in the Wang center at Stony Brook University, an exhibit highlighting Asian stereotypes within Marvel comics was on display. Upon visiting this exhibit, and taking time to read about each stereotype found in the comics, I realized that despite not being at war with Asians for decades, and having them integrated into our culture for over a century now, many of these stereotypes still exist and are prevalent.

An example of these stereotypes still being prevalent, the Brain describes and depicts an Asian person who carries extreme intelligence and excels at all things educational, however they lack in popularity and physical prowess. This is still a very typical view of Chinese and Japanese students in America. They are viewed as geniuses in the areas of math and science and anything other than an A+ is an “Asian F”.

Photo 14-3-13 上午11 18 35

T^4 Teaching To The Test

Despite being able to write about anything, having interests in thousands of subjects, hundreds of topics to provide an argument for. I always come back to one. The art of Teaching To The Test. Which is weird, because I do not want to go into to teaching, or anything educationally based for that matter. However this has always been something that has bothered me. A topic and idea that I could never agree with. A process that is destroying the American education system one course subject at a time.

I suppose now that I have introduced Teaching To The Test, I should explain what it is. It is a process that is currently running rampant through United States middle and high schools, in which the staff in charge of the STEM courses plan and arrange their course structure around state exams. During this process, the teachers choose to teach to the test, instead of teaching the subject and concepts for general knowledge and understanding. Instead, they target and arrange the “learning” process to memorize formulas and steps to get the right answers on the test.

Although this process does yield high results, and high test scores on a year to year basis, it has been shown that the students do not actually learn the subject, nor do they retain the information after the exams are over. This may not seem like a problem, however it has lead to a serious lack in general knowledge, performance on an international level as well as set backs in scientific as well as other areas.

This is a topic that needs to be addressed, a process that needs to be stopped and reformed in order to better American education as well as their international standing.

The Same Meaning, Found In Two Different Stories.

Although containing completely separate information, people, places, and titles, the two articles “Saving Ethopia’s ‘Church Forests'” and “Man discovers a new life at a South Africa truck stop” tell the same story. The story of the importance of realizing what is right in front of your eyes. Both authors, tell of a story of how a common, often over looked object ended up having much more significance than first believed. In the case of Beeland’s article, it was the significance of spiritually protected forests. While in Dunn’s it was the discovery of an entirely new order of life, a near impossible discovery, found right in front of people’s faces. Despite having almost identical themes and meanings, as always, two different authors use two different techniques.

The article, “Saving Ethopia’s ‘Church Forests'”  was written in almost a blog form intended to introduce its readers to a time pertinent subject of the deforestation in Ehtopia and why it is bad. Although there was very few new information that was not already known, the author still had to bridge the information gap as to what “Church Forests” actually were. However from then on the article took a standard approach to explaining the process of species gather and attempts to save the forests. Through the use of quotes, pictures and even videos in blog form, the author was able to effectively convey their intended information.

The article, “Man discovers a new life form at a South Africa Truck Stop” was written more in a scientific format. It was more formal and informative in order to accurately explain what had happened. The author was charged with bridging an even larger information gap than the other, having to introduce like species and orders, then explaining how and why the new discovery was “a new order of life”. The article also went into greater detail of the process of retrieving and classifying the said new order, as to help verify the new discovery.

The call to arms in a war against Extinction

Michelle Nijhuis, a popular author who discusses the methods behind animal conservation, provides a “call to arms” statement at the end of two of her drastically different, yet strikingly similar articles. In the two articles, Nijhuis describes the methods and the faults behind the methods of how scientist and politicians determine whether or not to save an endangered species. She highlights the ethical and economical concerns that overshadow the clearly obvious method of saving all of the species. Instead, she states that it is impossible to save them all, and choices will need to be made. So Nijhuis provides a call to arms to her readers, telling them that it’s time to take action, that it’s time to try and save them all, but also have the guts and the courage to stand up for the species you believe deserve to be saved, not just because a formula said to.

Thousands of lives on the line, Who do you save?

With the human population of the world growing exponentially, and it’s beginning to be a bad thing.  The world is quickly becoming an overpopulated ecological sphere with finite resources. As the human population expands, so does it’s necessity for space and resources, but where we take from one place, another loses. This has been happening generation after generation for centuries, Humans begin to expand and grow, while the wildlife standing in it’s way gets decimated. This has become all the more evident in the past few decades as numerous amounts of species dangling on the crumbling edge of survival and extinction. Being such a critical time period for many species, environmental conservationism has become a quite prevelant and important field of study with  Michelle Nijhuis, among other leading the charge.

Michelle Nijhuis, a journalist and 2011 Alicia Patterson Foundation Fellow, has devoted copious amounts of time into researching endangered species and the methods used to conserve them. With her journalistic background proving very adventurous, Michelle began to write articles describing the benefits behind conservationism, and the difficult and sometime unfair choices of the scientist who protect critically endangered species. Nijhuis wrote in several different styles and methods as a way to gain the maximum amount of exposure over a broad spectrum of readers. Most notably observed in two of her articles, “Which species will live?” and “Conservation Triage”.

The first of the articles, “Which species will live?” published in a 2012 edition of Scientific American conveys a more serious and intellectual tone. The article is very detail specific and address the main concerns of how a scientist is supposed to “Choose” which species lives and which species dies. She relates this choice, to choices made on the battlefields of war, triage. Although it is an effective method for attacking an overwhelmingly insurmountable task, it tends to become very biased and often choices are made without ethics and for personal reasons.

The second of the articles conveys a much more informal and relaxed tone. The “Conservation Triage” was not published to a mainly scientific source and doesn’t bother delving into much detail. Instead Nijhuis provides anecdotes and hypothetical to convey the general ideas and thoughts regarding the subject. This allows the author to effectively inform and notify a larger base of readers to the problem at hand. If she had included many details, professional statements, and specific summaries about the scientific behind difficult decisions, Nijhuis would have lost a large portion of her readers for this specific article.

The Scientific Method used to preach about…Science?

In the fast paced world of today’s generation, there is no time to stop and question the validity of the hundreds of thousands of claims thrown at us seemingly every second. With the inability to question, comes the general acceptance of incorrect and invalid “facts” leading to misunderstanding, misinformation as well as mistreatment and abuse of these acceptances. Out of all the bombardments, the most common acceptance of incorrect information tends to reside in the scientific field. In an effort to discover why, as well as how this occurs, several authors have taken it upon themselves to research, write and promote awareness. Of these authors, Karl Sagan and William Weed are two of the most notable and renowned. Together they have written several publications aimed to disprove and debunk common pseudoscientific and generically invalid claims. In order to complete this difficult and overwhelming task, both authors developed and employed a method using several analytical strategies and rhetorical tactics to most effectively articulate their arguments. Perhaps one of the most clear and effective methods was implemented by none other than William Weed in his revealing article “106 Science Claims and a Truckful of Baloney”. The article tackles a seemingly impossible one hundred and six claims that Weed had encountered during his daily activities. Throughout the article, Weed employed a variety of rhetorical and analytical methods aimed to capture the reader’s attention, but also to divide his arguments into sections making it easier for the reader to process.

Weed’s most clear cut and easily discernable approach to debunking common claims was organization. It is because of the sheer volume in which the average person experiences claims, Weed decided to include 106 separate and single claims he experienced on an average day. With such an enormous amount, not only is it hard to disprove them, but nearly impossible to have the intended audience take them in. Facing such adversity, Weed decided to use an effective business strategy known as “time-blocking” and introduce it into his article. Time blocking is the idea of splitting apart the hours in a day and devotes it to a specific objective, allowing the blocker to fully focus on that portion, sufficiently increasing its effectiveness.  Weed used this method to record his experiences into time-blocked sections, for example from when he first awoke at 6 A.M. until 7:15 A.M. In this short duration, without even leaving his home, Weed was subject to 13 claims from several different sources promising drastic changes in body type or composition. “3+ full inches in length”, “huge breasts overnight” and “look 20 years younger”, these are just a few of the claims and promises Weed was promised. Intelligently, after every time-blocked section, Weed included a section he entitles, “The Fine Print”, in which he states the main premise of the claim, followed by a less than three word judgment. But he doesn’t stop there, that would be too easy, instead he provides a detailed and simplistic explanation as to how and why it is incorrect, further debunking and exposing the lies and absurd claims once encountered, one at a time. Through this method, the daunting and overwhelming task of encountering 106 claims became easy, and quite enjoyable. It seems Weed’s strategy was that of strategy in eating an elephant during one sitting, one bite at a time.

Another effective and entertaining way Weed kept his audience hooked was his repeated use of sarcasm and sardonicism. By being sarcastic and sardonic, Weed provided a naturally dull process a unique flavor. Including this flavor not only provides a sense of personality and tone to the article, but also makes the article relatable as well as a pleasurable to read, instead of feeling as if it is a chore. Sarcasm and sardonicism is evident throughout the entire paper, it can be seen through witty retorts to claims, “This pill further claims to increase emotional stability by 67 percent. Such pseudoscientific precision increases the absurdity of the claim by at least 68 percent.”  Or even in his one word synopses of whether or not a claim is true, as seen in his 21st debunking “Extinct: Hogwash.” Essentially stating the claim is excrement from a male cow, in academic language.  Perhaps the largest example of sarcasm and sardonicism that exists within the article lies within the name of the segment of “The Fine Print”. The name itself is a play on “the fine print” generally provided from the companies and parties making such claims that when read, self-debunk the claim. Weed was able to take this existing idea of listing the truth in 2-pt font and create a subspace to provide readers with his own research and conclusions. Without the use of these two literary techniques, the article would become drab, losing its readers and thus its effectiveness and purpose.

Although some strategies provide the reader with a source of entertainment and differentiation from the norm, the use of ethos and logos throughout his research on claims is what provides the reliability of the article. Ethos is one’s credibility and the weight their words carry, if one has poor ethos, then their words do not mean much. If Weed himself simply went through his claims and determined whether or not they were true, it would be natural to question whether or not he was making another invalid claim, thus continuing the perpetuation of misinformation. However, that is not the case. Weed came to his judgments based off of factual evidence and research, often provided by well accredited and vetted sources including but not limited to, the FDA, The Times, and most impressively The Journal of the American Medical Association. With ethos unconsciously factoring whether or not something can be believed, Weed inserted a few snide comments to bring down the ethos of others. He does this not to bolster his own arguments, but to demonstrate to the reader that well know public figures should not have a strong ethos in academic settings without proving their merit. This attack on ethos is most apparent when Weed begins to describe a radio show host, as a replacement for a drug addicted star, “hear the angry voice of Roger Hedgecock, the man sitting in for Rush Limbaugh, who is in rehab for drug addiction.” Similarly, Weeds use of logos is evident throughout the article. Logos is the use a logic by the writer in an effort to appeal to and relate to the readers own logic. If the writer is not effective and proficient in his use of logos, then his own logical arguments will fall on deaf ears and daft minds, once again proving useless.  The logic used by Weed is that of a simple thinking, but it is often pushed aside for convenience. It is that of common sense, the ability to notice details and apply basic level critical thinking to find reason, or lack thereof, within a claim. This is evident throughout “The Fine Print”, where before even delving into research for certain claims, he asks the reader to stop and realize a simple fact “No pill can enlarge breasts overnight” and “Drugs can’t extend penis length (except temporarily)”.

The manner in which Weed articulates his arguments and exposures to the claims is that of a narrative. A Narrative strategy is a very effective means of not only setting context for the articles, but as an appeal to the readers pathos. Let’s begin with the most obvious advantage in using a narrative, the setting. By being able to tell a personal story of Weed’s  experiences, he was able to become the artist of the background, allowing him to direct and change the scenario with relative ease. The more effective advantage posed through a narrative, lies within the appeal to pathos. Pathos is the emotions and thoughts of the reader. If Weed was able to connect to how the reader felt, how they connected with the experiences Weed encountered, then they would be more likely to not only understand his logic and ideas, but they would also have a stronger belief in his ethos and the ability to realize when they themselves are being presented or exposed to a claim.

When you combine all of the techniques and strategies used by Weed throughout his article, you begin to realize the dedication and hard work that went into creating such a piece. With the number of literary and rhetorical devices, Weed was able to take an insurmountably large and difficult task and complete it with relative ease and grace. Without the time-blocking, the appeals to ethos and logos, use of sarcasm and sardonicism, along with numerous other devices; the article was able to translate the message and serve as it was intended to, exposing the truth.

It’s Scientifically Proven.

“106 Science Claims”, an article written by William Weed, intended to inform the general public of common misconceptions. The main focus of these misconceptions being of course the “‘science’ claims” that the everyday person has forcefully and subliminally thrust upon them. Weed claims that the average person is subject to an uninformed and unreliable scientific claim about every ten minutes. This overwhelming amount of claims then get taken as facts, despite having no validity. Weed was able to inform the general public of these scientific fallacies through the use of his personal life. Beginning at 6 A.M., Weed records in detail every claim he encounters, whether it be regarding the food he eats, the products he uses or advertisements he sees. Separating them into certain and specific time blocks, Weed eases the burden on the reader; allowing them time to process and recognize them. Not only does Weed’s separation allow the reader easier exposure to the “106 science claims” in total, but it allows him to go further into detail on how and why they are just what he says, claims.

Weed’s observations and  explanations go hand in hand with what I have thought all along. I agree with the fact that the population is over exposed to broad and invalid science claims targeted to sell a product. Companies and businesses can hire and pay actors or even doctors to give a recommendation for their product, and with careful wording avoid the FDA and other means of regulation.

Neurogasm, an energy drink sold here at Stony Brook University. Directly on the bottle it claims that it “supports healthy circulation”, and even “promotes healthy aging”. Can this be so true? The fountain of youth in a bottle?  HA, that’s funny. Healthy circulation is best gained and accessed through cardiovascular exercise and a correct diet. Just because the drink contains one amino acid that could help, doesn’t mean it is a miracle maker. Furthermore, have you ever heard of healthy aging? Aging is the oxidation and degradation of cells from bacteria and pollutants, literally your cells are dying. But don’t worry, if you drink Neurogasm, you’ll do it in a healthy manner.

Everyday, even every hour we are bombarded with advertisements for “diet pills” and “fat burners”, magical pills that you can shovel into your mouth along with any guilty pleasure food you desire. I can’t even begin to explain the anger and rage that such claims bring me. As a natural bodybuilder who works out every day, these claims are not only one hundred percent false, but they are dangerous. The reason that they are “so effective” and the clients “lose weight” is because they are loop diuretics. Pills that alter the permeability of ions in the kidney, specifically in the loop of Henle, causing an excessive loss of water. You’re not losing fat people, you’re draining your body of 70% of it’s existence with every pill. Don’t believe me? Go ask Dr. Cabot and Dr. Collins, the BIO 203 professors, see how they feel on the subject.

As an example of how most people don’t know much about science. There is a deadly chemical compound that is tasteless, colorless, odorless and causes thousands of deaths every year. What is this deadly compound? DHMO, Dihydrogen Monoxide. Ingestion of DHMO causes sweating, bloating, frequent urination, bloating and in serious cases, poisoning. Out of the human body, DHMO destroys the environment, causing erosion of habitats and even contributes to the greenhouse effect. We should ban DHMO right?! Why would we expose ourselves and the planet to this deadly compound? Well…. because it’s water that’s why. Yeah, Dihydrogen “H2” Monoxide “O”, add them together and you get H2O.